Someone recently commented to me that, for women over 50, divorce is a “death sentence” and circumstances mean that there is no hope of a happier future. The words reminded me of the deep pain and despair that divorce can
5 Reasons the New Year is good for your Divorce
New Year’s Eve, with it’s positive celebrations, can feel bitter and painful when you are without the person you thought you would be spending the rest of your life with. The period leading up to a New Year is
Christmas with a Broken Heart? Be Kind to Yourself
My first Christmas post-break-up was emotionally tough; it was 10 months after my marriage had ended and the resurgence of grief took me by surprise. Special occasions can knock you off guard just when you think you are coping, and
When a loss is a win
When I started writing ‘Break Up and Shine’, I wanted to show others that a painful divorce need not be the end of everything good in your life, however horrendous it feels in the beginning. You can heal and move on, and it can
The New Year: Cycles and Goals
I feel like 2016 has been a year of consolidation and sowing the seeds for the next fruitful chapter of my life. I have barely written on this blog all year and have considered whether, six years on from the
Closing a door
As I approach the end of my counselling training this year, I have also just reached the end of more than a year of my own personal counselling. I ended my therapy with the feeling that although personal growth is a
New Life
Today is my daughter’s birthday and I was feeling quite reflective this morning, as I often do when I contemplate the birth of my children. This time six years ago I felt blessed. I’d just given birth to our third
Good Therapy? Feel More, Think Less
As humans we possess a natural curiosity to find solutions for problems, and to look for reasons why things don’t work. When dealing with emotional issues, this can have real benefit, but it isn’t always the most helpful thing we
The Loneliness of Unmet Needs
Here’s an interesting revelation that only came to me through my current counselling training: It’s not wrong to have needs in a relationship It may sound obvious to many, but I really didn’t understand that properly during my marriage. My ex-husband
Children: The divorce heroes
My beautiful boys were 6 and 4 years old when we sat down and told them that daddy was not going to be living with us anymore; my baby girl was little more than newborn. I was as angry that